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Brian Keyes

Wizards need to fire Ernie Grunfeld

The Washington Wizards have not won 50 games in a season since 1979, the last time they went to the NBA Finals. They haven’t won a championship since 1978. In my lifetime, there has been little optimism for the state of the organization, beyond drafting franchise savior John Wall. You can point to all sorts

Phil Chenier deserves a spot in the rafters

To the basketball fans in Washington DC who didn’t grow up watching The Bullets back in the 1970’s, the name Phil Chenier brings to mind the cool, collected, color analyst for the Wizards. Most DC residents probably know him for that honestly, as he’s been doing the job for over 30 years. But for those

Beckys of the world set to face discrimination after release of new Beyonce album

Editor’s Note: The following is a satirical work of opinion, and is not intended to be interpreted literally.  It seems like most celebrities can’t go three days without saying or doing something to disparage some group or another. Whether it be Azealia Banks and the queer community or Gilbert Arenas and all female athletes, the news is filled

September Horoscopes

BY BRIAN KEYES, STYLE EDITOR Aries: If you really think about it, all instruments are mandolins. Life is a mandolin. We are all simply notes in the mandolin rock-ballad of the universe. Taurus: Death is inevitable. It comes for all of us. It is the one inescapable truth in all of life, the one absolute

The Real Maine

BY BRIAN KEYES, STYLE EDITOR   White people, boats, and high end camping stores. All things that imply wealth and affluence, and all things commonly used to describe one state in particular. Maine. There is a commonly held idea that those who live in Maine look and live like the people who visit Maine. Upper

Fort Reno’s Summer Concerts Come to an End

BY BRIAN KEYES, STYLE EDITOR The yearly summer concerts at Fort Reno are a chance for local bands to cut their teeth on a fresh audience, and to even perhaps gain the beginnings of a following. Sadly, Monday was the last of the year, so I thought it my civic duty to go and silently

Emancipation Day Concert

BY BRIAN KEYES, STYLE EDITOR This Saturday downtown there will be a free concert held in honor of Emancipation Day along with other activities. The concert will be at Freedom Plaza, at 14th St NW and Pennsylvania Ave NW. The concert will take place from 4:30 pm to 8:30 pm, and will be followed by

Students March Against Police Brutality in Friendship Heights

BY BRIAN KEYES, STYLE EDITOR PHOTO SLIDESHOW BY ANNA BUCKNUM Yesterday a group of around 20 students met at Fort Reno, several with handmade signs, for a protest against police brutality in reaction to the events that occurred in Baltimore surrounding the death of Freddie Gray. Junior Kellik Dawson organized the protest last week. Although he says

DCPS Makes Cuts to Wilson’s Budget for 2015-2016 School Year

BY BRIAN KEYES,  JUNIOR EDITOR Interim Principal Gregory Bargeman wrote in a Sunday email that he was “dismayed” when he received the new budget for the 2015-2016 school year at Wilson, and saw massive cuts, contradicting what DCPS Chancellor Kaya Henderson wrote in a Thursday letter, that the school system’s budget would in fact be

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