Fruit of the Month

Bella Lujan

Aviv Roskes and Claire Schmitt

Honeycrisp. Ever heard of it?

We both feel that apples represent life, continuity, change, and spiritual rebirth. The time is now fall, and fall is the time for apples. What does that mean? We could not be more excited to introduce you to three of the trendiest apples this season.

The first bite of a Gala apple makes us feel like little kids again. It left us wanting more, but not in a good way. It was good, sure, but this apple definitely has a dusty undertone. If you like a light, soft apple, this might be a good one for you. But if you want an extraordinary apple, one that makes a statement? Look elsewhere.

Fair warning: we knew Honeycrisp was our favorite going in. Does that make us biased? Maybe. But is “favorite apple” still a well-deserved title for the Honeycrisp? Absolutely.

Everyone who’s anyone will tell you that a Honeycrisp apple is bold. As we took our first bites of this apple, we could easily see why this is one of the up-and-coming apples in America, and predicted to be among the top three favorite apples in America by 2020. Let’s break this word down into its roots: “Honey”—honey means sweet, and this apple sure is. “Crisp”—this apple is very crisp. Every bite of the Honeycrisp apple reminds us to give it the attention it craves and deserves. It is sweet and tart at the same time. Remember in “Ratatouille” when Remy eats the cheese with the strawberry, and fireworks go off inside of his head? That’s how we felt eating this apple, but like people and not rats.

There was a third type of apple in Claire’s fridge, but this one didn’t have a sticker on it. But, don’t worry about missing out; what we will now refer to as the “Mystery Apple” was terrible. We each took one bite, and that was more than enough. It was mushy, it was too sweet, and it was flavorless. It made us yearn for those Gala days.

En résumé, a Honeycrisp apple perfectly embodies how we want to be as people: kind, gentle, fashionable, forward-thinking. The Gala was good, but didn’t knock our socks off. A search through the dark apple web revealed that the Mystery Apple is really a Macoun. We don’t know what else to say about this apple. It just wasn’t good.